Friday, April 1, 2011

The Truth About Love Compatibility

I've had my 'Aha' moment. I've come to the realization that in order to be in a long lasting relationship with someone you need to have similar values and personality traits that run deep to your core that will work with each other. Hobbies, interests, or other similarities can always change over time. Just because you and your partner both love to ski or share other hobbies, doesn't mean this person is your soulmate. One of you could always hurt yourself and forever be unable to do certain physical activities that you have previously shared together. Having separate hobbies and interests may be healthier than having all the same ones, it forces you to seek interest and respect the individuality of the other person.

The things that DO matter in a lasting, loving, long-term relationship are core values, morals, and personality (more so temperament, since personality also can change over time). This puts me at ease because my boyfriend and I have ALL the same values and morals, apart from what we are interested in objectively. We may have different senses of humor but ultimately our temperament works really well together. He is easy and I am slow-to-warm-up. I guess that's where the extroversion in him comes into play and the introversion in me stands. He is going to help me be more adaptable and I will help him become more hesitant and reserved about things he carries through in his daily life.

So, what it comes down to is; you don't have to love each others' hobbies and interests, you just have to respect them. Respect for each others' differences goes a long way. Love is not easy. It's something that doesn't just happen on its own, it's something you have to create and work at.


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